Decisions, decisions, decisions…and more decisions. Colors, flowers, venues, and of course, the first look. Should you do one? Every decision you’ll make while planning your wedding will inevitably come with a few tradeoffs. If you’ve been grappling with whether to do a first look before you strut down the aisle, you have come to the right place. In my years as a wedding photographer, I’ve seen both sides. Here is my advice when it comes to determining if a first look fits into your vision for your day.

What is a First Look?

They say it’s bad luck to see each other before the wedding…but what about just one tiny peek? That’s exactly what a first look is: a private moment shared between the couple (and likely your photographer!!) before the ceremony starts. It can be a great way to shake out some nerves, share a special moment of connection, and of course, snap some photos!

Why You Should Do a First Look

If you already like the idea of a first look, let me share a few more insights from my experience. As a photographer, one of my favorite perks of a first look is the extra time you get for photos. It can make for a more relaxed wedding timeline, plus, your photographer gets to snap a few precious shots of your genuine reactions!

The time spent on photos before the ceremony is more time you get to enjoy cocktail hour with your guests. And speaking of spending time with guests, I find some couples realize they’re so busy with greeting family and friends, they miss out on some valuable time with their partner. Consequently, some couples appreciate that quiet, intimate moment before the nonstop festivities. You’ll feel busy the entire day, so a moment of stillness with your partner can be a much needed intermission between the chaos of getting ready and all the celebrations to follow.

A first look might be a great fit if you…

• Feel nervous about walking down the aisle
• Want a quiet moment together before the celebration begins
• Have a large wedding party or big family to photograph
• Want to attend as much of cocktail hour as possible
• Are planning a winter wedding with limited daylight (speaking of winter weddings…What Season Should You Get Married?)
• Love candid, emotional moments
• Have a tight wedding timeline
• Are okay with taking a less traditional route

Why You Should Skip the First Look

Selfishly, I love a first look! It gives a bit more flexibility for pictures and I love being up close to capture the intimate moment when couples see each other for the first time on their big day. However, that’s not to say you have to do one. There are many reasons couples choose to wait until they meet at the altar.

Just like doing a first look makes for a beautiful reaction, saving that look for the aisle can create a moment that is just as emotional! I’ve seen both! Sometimes that anticipation followed by the fairytale moment of the bride appearing is just what a couple envisions. And sharing that moment in front of family and friends can make the experience that much more special.

Capturing the precious emotions (of everyone!) during the bride’s entrance are some of my favorite photos to take! Waiting until the ceremony is certainly a more traditional approach, so if you’re a couple who dreams of that traditional wedding, skipping the first look might be the right choice!

A traditional aisle reveal might be a better fit if you…

• Have always pictured seeing each other for the first time at the ceremony
• Love honoring that tradition
• Have plenty of time built into your schedule after the ceremony
• Feel strongly about sharing that first moment in front of your loved ones
• Want the anticipation of waiting

To Cry or Not To Cry…

If you’ve ever been anywhere near wedding content, you’ve probably heard someone ask, “Do you think they’re going to cry?” And for good reason! Everyone is eager to see whether the couple (and especially the groom!) will shed a few tears at this very special and emotional celebration.

One thing I’ve noticed is that couples who choose to do a first look often feel a little more comfortable showing those emotions. Since it’s just the two of them (plus me quietly documenting from a distance!), there’s no audience watching, making it easier to be fully present in the moment.

That said, waiting until the ceremony doesn’t make the moment any less emotional. Walking down the aisle for the first time, surrounded by your family and friends, can bring out just as many happy tears. Every couple experiences their wedding day differently, and there’s no “right” way to react. Whether you’re laughing, crying, or doing a little bit of both, those genuine emotions are always my favorite moments to capture.

My Biggest Piece of Advice

Don’t choose a first look because Pinterest told you to. Don’t skip one because your friends did. Choose the option that feels right for you as a couple. Your wedding day is about celebrating your relationship, and there’s no one-size-fits-all way to experience it.

If you’re still not sure if a first look is right for you, I’d love to help! Every wedding is unique, and I’m always happy to walk couples through their timeline and offer guidance based on what will make their day feel the most relaxed, meaningful, and of course, yield the best photos! If you’re ready to start planning, let’s chat!